A Little Elaboration

Sigh. Five hours of sleep will not be enough.

So, my last post didn't explain much.

Central American Man showed up at work for my first break. We talked. It was awkward as we didn't have much to say to each other. Whatever. That's fine.

Then. He declared he would wait around for my next break so we could talk some more. Ummmm. Hmmmm. I said he didn't have to do that, but he insisted.

So, by my second break I was exhausted with the start of a head ache. I glanced around, but didn't see Central American Man. I felt relieved. (Which is very telling of where this non-relationship is going). My feet were killing me, so I wasn't going to go searching for him. I went and hid in the break room and had a nice conversation with the security guard about becoming a teen dad.

At the end of my break I run into Central American Man. He was upset. Apparently he'd returned to the cafe minutes after I left.

Me: I've been thinking, I don't think this will work.
CAM: But you said you only want serious relationships, like me.
Me: Ummmm.

(When I do eventually date, I plan to date with the intention of marriage...somewhere down the road. I think to this man "serious" means date and then marry by the month's end.)

CAM: Can I call you, so we can talk about this.
Me: Ummmm, well I'm off Tuesday.

I meant for him to call Tuesday. I think he interpreted that we meet on Tuesday, but he call...well, keep reading....

CAM: Okay, then what time can I call tomorrow?
Me: I should be home from work by about 8.
CAM: Oh, well then, why don't I take you out to dinner then. Get away from this place.
Me: Wait what?
Cam: 7:45. We'll meet downstairs.
Me: Ummm, okay?

Curse the subtle manipulation. I mean, he knew I wasn't doing anything that night. I couldn't lie. Bah humbug. I wish I had a time machine. All I had to say was "I don't think that'll be a good idea." Why couldn't my brain form the simple words?

In my defense, I was exhausted and by the end of the conversation, I was also five minutes late to getting back to work.

So, the plan for tonight is to end this dinner business before it begins. I shall drink lots of coffee during work in the hopes that I won't be dead by the end of shift. I will start the conversation with "this can't happen." None of this "Hi, how are you?" business. I mean it. Right at the doors to Barnes and Noble. I will be authoritative (but not mean). I will say that his type of serious relationship, or at this point, any other type of relationship with him, is not an option. Go find another girl. And that will be that.

I only wish I didn't have to wait until tonight to do this. I want to get it over with.

This had better work.

Of course, the other option is to call in sick for work and be a no show for Central American Man. That'll send the same message, right? But I suppose that would be the coward's path. And it would be mean. (I'll save it as a last resort in case Plan Nice, but Authoritative doesn't work)

Then I'll swear off men. For a long time. Again.

My life hurts. And so does my head. Curse my lack of sleep. *I shake my fist at you in anger*